06:03:10 :::: radioShirley presents “BIG!”

pic by Happy Little Nomad

Greetings Shirleyphiles and welcome to another 40 minutes or so of low-fi lovliness!

Big cars, big hands, big dreams, big hair, big people and big mistakes. Ah yes, we’ve all crossed paths with some of these big things once, twice or thrice in our lifetimes. But what do you do when faced with the enormous or the oversized? Do you gawk? Do you recoil and shrink into a tinier state of mind or do you take a giant leap into the towering mass of whatever and embrace the difference? I mean, size. Its all relative isn’t it?

mr.K and yours truly have been pondering about “size” ever since he brought home the largest aubergine I have ever seen in my life last week and plonked it on the kitchen bench with a flourish of pride as if he was some kind of big game hunter presenting a trophy vegetable.

“What are we going to do with that … that … thing?” I exclaimed.
“Well Shirl, we could cook it. We could put a funny hat on it and lay it in the hammock. We could spend this evening playing Mr. Potato Head games with it. Whatever takes takes your fancy, my dear!”
“But its so … so … large and purple mr.K! I doubt that it will even fit into the crisper!”

So we stood there for quite some time, just gazing at this freakish vegetable. I have no idea what was going through his head and to be honest, I was somewhat hesitant to ask when I noticed a smirk cross his lips and a rather perverse gleam enter his eyes. On that signal, I turned. I could’ve run, but instead decided to leave The Great Purple Vegetable hunter to delight in his catch and settle myself into the couch with an old Jane Austen I’ve been wanting to read for ages.

Another hour passed. mr.K hadn’t moved or uttered a sound until I heard a squawk from the kitchen.
“But Shirl, it was big and it was cheap!”
I do wonder about masculine logic sometimes. I really do.

Three days have passed and it is still on the bench. I’m not sure whether he expects me to feed it or what. I’ll tell you this though, if it hasn’t disappeared tomorrow I’m going to demand that it starts to pay rent!

*be smooched*
laShirl and mr. Kenneth

DOWNLOAD & STREAM .mp3 (15mb)

18:09:09 :::: radioShirley presents “ENGAGED!”

Greetings Shirleyphiles and welcome to another 40 minutes or so of low-fi lovliness!

Well I just bet the title of this show made a few of the regular Shirleyphiles spit the pins out, hey? Alarmed internal voices throughout the cybersphere crying out “What??!! Shirl engaged!! Did mr.K finally go down on his knees before our Shirl with a proposition she couldn’t refuse? Or vice versa??!! Heavens to betsy!! Where’s the party? What will I wear? Who’s doing the catering?”
No. No. No.No. Put the knives and smelling salts down, dears. Its none of the above.

I know its been sometime between Pimms, but the engagement of two of our faves, Donat and Louise (DT – musician, Francophile and possessor of an encyclopedic, enviable brain crammed with all manner of musical detritus & the gorgeous LB – extraordinary artist and the human heart behind Drawing Girl) requires special acknowledgment round these parts!
Lacking any real idea for a suitable gift, mr.K and I decided to do what we know best and lovingly craft a celebratory show in honour of this fabulous news. We’re sure they have just about everything they need. After all, they have each other and as the song goes, who could ask for anything more, right? Wrong! These two love birds deserve to be “Shirled” and Shirled they shall be!

Well, who have been gathered together to join the hijinx? For starters, Yoko Ono, The Nerves, The Shangri-Las, Question Mark & The Mysterians, Lily Tomlin, Paul Mauriat, Joe Youngblood, Eartha Kitt, Normie Rowe, Screamin’ Jay Hawkins, Shower Scene from Psycho, John Prine and Iris Dement, Orange Juice, Brigitte Bardot, Rachel Sweet, Penguin Cafe Orchestra, Ivor Cutler, Cilla Black, Sherbet and wrapping it all up are The Passions with slice of delicious pop and wise words, “Love is Essential”.

So Shirleyphiles, join us in raising your collective fruitcups to Donat & Louise! mr.K will be joining DT & LB tonight ahem – next week – with a bunch of their wild and crazy Scooby gang and I expect a full report of the high brow goings on that will no doubt occur in an outer Brisbane suburb. I do hope mr.K can remember his name and address if he needs to ask a friendly policeman for directions home!

*be smooched*
laShirl and mr. Kenneth

DOWNLOAD & STREAM.mp3 (17mb)

UPDATE : mr.K has just arrived home rather embarassed, poor luv. It seems in his excitement he got the date of the engagement party all wrong!!! He turned up to LB & DT’s digs … unusually quiet party he mused while ringing the doorbell only to be greeted by a bemused Donat when asked “So where’s the party?” “It’s on next Friday, Ken”. Well, I’m quite beside myself with laughter. Oh dear. But mr.K tells me he was able to have a couple of quiet beers and a pleasant natter with the couple du jour before being escorted safely to the nearest bus stop where he stood shaking his head in befuddled wonder at this senior of senior moments. And he has the nerve to tell me I’m dizzy sometimes! Rest assured I’ll be dining out on this social faux pas at a certain manservant’s expense for sometime … hehe.

08:05:09 :::: radioShirley presents “Animal Crackers!

Greetings Shirleyphiles and welcome to another 40 minutes or so of low-fi lovliness!

Well its getting a little chilly round these parts and when Shirl’s parts get a little chilly, yours truly reaches for her favourite fur coat. Now before you start throwing cream pies and planning how to knee cap me next time we meet in the carpark, the fur in question is 100% endorsed by the late Linda McCartney herself! No, its not woven from Sir Paul’s pubic shedding – heaven forbid – but is a fabulous faux little number which fits me to a tee and fools just about everyone! Even mr.K looked twice when I swished in wearing said fur for the first time. Always the thoughtful one, for the first two weeks he would leave it a bowl of water as it lay languid across the lounge.

That’s more than Heather did for Sir Paul I bet!

So for all the Shirleyphiles feeling the chill, this show is for you! Unhinged as we are, we’ve thrown open the cages with Pavlovian technique and released our animal instincts along with Tom Jones, The Trashmen, Slim Whitman, Mama Cass, Iggy Pop, Dusty Springfield, Mrs Miller, Ivor Cutler, Wire, Nick Cave, The Birthday Party, Rex Harrison, Kate Bush, Benzell Graham, Brigette Bardot, The Nutty Squirrels, Jonathon Richman & The Modern Lovers, Tiny Tim, Ella Mae Morse & The Kinks. How’s that for a musical menagerie!

Until next time listeners, move the cat out of harms way, feed the birds tuppence a bag and give the next furry friend you come across a little scratch behind the ear. You should see mr.K roll over each time I do that to him! It’s positively canine, darlings!

*be smooched*
laShirl and mr. Kenneth

DOWNLOAD & STREAM.mp3 (15mb)

Perhaps you’re looking for some of the past shows? .mp3 versions can be found HERE