31:07:11 ::: radioShirley presents “ART”

Image : Michelle’s Pics 3

Greetings Shirleyphiles and welcome to another 40 minutes or so of low-fi lovliness!

When in doubt, I usually turn to UrbanDictionary.com much to mr.K’s horror
for definitions around life, the universe and all the rest. So it goes that when
I posed the question to my manservant “mr.K, what is art?” his speech degenerated
into a miasma of metaphor and analogy that made no sense to my post-cocktail
hour addled brain whatsoever. Notice I said “post-cocktail” … not “post-colonial”.
Mind you, the pretentious wankery that fell from his lips after I posed the big
question to him certainly had a whiff of the post-colon about it. Frustrated that
the hired help couldn’t answer a simple question in terms that I could comprehend
I fled to the laptop and fired up UrbanDictionary.com in need something more
meaty and erm, real. As usual, what came up didn’t fail. Straight to the point.
No nonsense.

11. Art : “A guy with a really large nose. He usually knocks people over with it,
and generally gets in the way. If he has a runny nose, it causes landslides.

Oh my god, its art! Dive to the left before he steamrolls you with his nose!

So there you have it, Shirleyphiles. When someone at an opening gets a bit
sniffy and chin-strokingly self important with you, stick a finger up your nose
and ask him or her if their name is “Art”. Guaranteed to elicit more chin stroking,
an expression of mock horror and result in them moving away rather quickly
giving you more space to breathe. And yes, sometimes you need that space
more than you know.

mr.K wasn’t entirely convinced though and decided to compile this selection
of tuneage and assorted yummy sound bites from Dory Previn, Rufus Wainwright,
Orange Juice, The Residents, Kaye Starr, John Cale, Joyce Grenfell, The Breeders,
Salavador Dali, 10CC, David Essex, Bryon Gysin and many others to support
his porridge-like argument.

I like it. But I like “the guy with a really large nose” explanation much better.
You decide m’dears.

Until next time kids, take care and play fair!
*be smooched*
radioShirl and mr. Kenneth


About radioShirley



  1. ib

    “…stick a finger up your nose and ask him or her if their name is “Art”.”

    Yes. I believe I subscribe to that sentiment.

    Milo is busy fingerpainting the tray on his highchair. The occasional directional splash just to punctuate a climbing wail. It will never find a home in The Tate, sadly.

    Unless it’s a Pollock, don’t believe the hype.

  2. radioshirley

    Don’t be too hasty ib … finger-painted highchairs may be the next big thing!

    Never Mind the Pollocks, Here’s Milo! 😉

    Thanks for stopping by, squire.

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